What you lot think of as Christmas Eve, us lot think of as the Eve of the Thud.
Ursa Major created the world but didn’t have any colouring-in skills so He sent Ursa Minor to Earth with some holy crayons, paints and oils and that.
Ursa Minor was very good at colouring stuff in and on what we now call Ursmas, Ursa Minor landed with an almighty Thud somewhere just outside Kent.
He attracted many followers around the world as he painted His way across the globe. Stopped at many taverns and pie shops blessing each of them with a lick of paint and a signed portrait.
Ursa Minor was pretty much loved by everyone! He brought colour to their lives, profits to the pie and booze shops and could tell some blindingly witty jokes and anecdotes (like the one about Ursa Major’s stocking disaster. That never gets old!)
Of course Ursmas means a lot more to the younger bears just starting out on their discovery of pies and beer but deep down we all enjoy it and bang our beer mugs on the table and tell dirty jokes while we wait for the pies to cook.
Beary Ursmas, you gorgeous smashers you!