’bout time I had my own space to vent and fume and kiss and fondle… woaaaaaarr!! what’s new, you sausages? me… well now, as ever i’m at home twiddling my paws wonderin’ what on hecking earth i can get up to while i’m on my own. i see there’s plenty of shoes to dump in but lately i’ve been feeling that this just isn’t enough to fill my life full of joy.
i’ve eaten all the food they’d been saving, i done a wee in the plant pot, i taught tequila terry a new swear word that was strangely absent from his universe and i also used marty’s credit card to buy porn and sent it to his mum. what’s left? been watching repeats of life on mars recently, that was all right wasn’t it. terry doesn’t see the appeal but he wasn’t around in the seventies like what i was so stuff him. he’s out with marty anyway, probably being pimped out for small change by now. pippety pip, you slags. be lucky! jeb